Monday, August 28, 2017

Take the Advice You'd Give to Your Sister

Tres de mis cuatro y todas ellas son mis favoritas. Mis Hermanas. Circa 06/2017
...because it’s usually better than the advice you’d give to yourself. Isn't it something? The way we would absolutely lose it if we watched others that we care about go through the hell and the chaos we allow ourselves to experience? Insert the little chocolate girl emoji raising her hand because I’m guilty of it also. I think at one point or time in life, we all are. 

We let others use and take advantage of us. We keep our mouths closed when we know we deserve the promotion or the opportunity. We stay silent, all in the name of love or at the desperate hope that things will get better in a toxic relationship. We hold on for dear life to our comfort zone. …we settle for less…way less.. way way less. We dance with fear even though we desire to be consumed by the faith to do something we’ve never done or to pursue the impossible…and yet our actions don’t match the advice we’d give to the ones we love. So then, is this a question of how much we value and love ourselves? If you have an idea or answer, I'm seriously asking.

Why is it that we’ll endure or put up with and settle for treatment that we know isn’t right? Why don’t we stick stubbornly to our standards with full confidence, and be our very own cheerleaders, protectors, defenders, and support systems first and foremost?  It takes serious effort to decide that come what may, you’re going to put yourself first, and do what’s best for you- aside from what someone else thinks. Being human requires this balancing act of being vulnerable and sensitive enough to give and receive from others but fierce enough to "clap back" when necessary. It’s the perfect chemistry of being wise as a serpent and gentle as a dove, and it’s hard to master.

I hate not having solutions. In the last few years of life, I’ve embraced some solid advice given to me by my mother “be who you were made to be, not who you were raised to be.” Her words are a consistent wake-up call and a personal reminder of who I am and what I deserve. I’ve decided to just try my best. Even when I don’t make the right decision, get back up and try my best. When I’m wary of what others may think or say, make the best decision for myself- and try my best to put my heart’s desires first- this is my life.
I’ve learned that if we try our best, in the end, we win. We grow. We learn. We forgive ourselves. We understand ourselves. We become our best selves. That was the advice I was giving to an amazing young mind today, and it’s the advice I will take for myself. Just try my best, and take peace with that. One thing my soul reminds my heart of is that the words I give to others as valuable inspiration- is what I too am worth.


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